Well I had my 3rd weigh in last night, and I lost .8 of a pound! That's almost a whole pound! Now, why do I feel better about losing .8 instead of .4. Well, because it's more, obviously! I've figured that even if you only have a .4 loss, it's still a loss and needs to be celebrated.
I've been feeling really shitty all week long, pretty sure I have a sinus infection again. If I do, it'll be my 3rd this year. Usually I get one a year, just one! I have no idea what's going on. It's making me pretty nauseous which is the feeling I hate the most. Nausea is generally something I feel from migraines, but also with sinus infections. I absolutely hate it because when I feel like I want to puke I want to be eating bread, bread, bread! It also really helps to eat ramen, or chicken noodle soup, both of which have huge amounts of sodium and preservatives. Of course I could make it from scratch (the chicken noodle) but who wants to do that when you feel like your head should be in a toilet bowl!?
So how can I stay on track while being sick? Limit the amount of carbs I'm taking in. I had chicken noodle soup two days ago, but only had one serving, that was low sodium, instead of eating an entire can. I also made sure to drink my 12 8oz glasses of water too, to flush out any extra sodium my body might be trying to keep.
Also the other thing I do to stay on track is try to eat as normally as I can even though I don't really feel like eating at all. If I need more fruits and veggies I can squeeze them into a protein shake to keep up my intake. Plus drinking food right now feels way better than chewing and swallowing.
My Mom is baking cranberry almond cookies right now, and the house is filled with the delicious smell of cookies! Which also is making me feel ill, surprise surprise! Well at least it's a way to avoid bringing on cookies! It's also my friends Bday on Monday and she requested that I make chocolate peanut butter cupcakes! Now that is an undertaking I'm excited about. I have a amazing vegan buttercream recipe (I think it's in my first or second entry) that I'm going to turn into peanut butter buttercream!
Anyway that's all for now. I hope I feel better soon and I'll try to update a little more. MAN I wish I didn't feel so gross because those cookies smell damn amazing :)
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
FINALLY!
Well, sorry for such a long time since my last post! So much has happened! I've been getting acupuncture for my migraines, had a Drs appointment, have another tomorrow with my Dermatologist, spent this past weekend away in Seattle, and went to a sporting event!
So last week was my first official weigh in, let's talk about that. I lost .4 of a lb. I was so depressed and disapointed in myself and the program that I wanted to go right to McDonalds and eat a quarter pounder and a large fry! Thankfully my Mom talked me out of it and we went home and made a delicious meal together (Hungry Girl Chow Mein) which is amazing BTW.
So how do you overcome a disappointing weigh in? Well not by eating crap! That's for sure! I knew something I was doing was wrong. Last time I was on WW I lost 5lbs in the first week! What had changed this time? Well the plan and the points system have changed...OH fruit is 0 points now! I had been eating anywhere from 5-8 servings of fruit a day. That was totally my problem. Just because fruit is free doesn't mean you should eat so many servings of it! Fruit has a lot of natural sugar, and some fruits are very carby.
OK so after getting my fruit intake to 3-4 servings a day and upping my veggie intake (Stir fry is a great way to sneak in veggies! Also homemade egg white breakfast burritos loaded with peppers, mushrooms, spinach, and onions is also a good way to sneak in veggies). I finally had a weight loss this week! I lost 2lbs! YAY! I now weigh 171! Next week I might even be down into the 160's. That would be really amazing :)
So how did I lose weight this week? Well cut back on fruit, upped veggies, I always, ALWAYS, try to drink 12 8oz glasses of water a day, and most importantly I try to track every.single.thing.I.eat! I cannot even express how important that is. Took a bit of cheesecake? Track it! Even if it's just one point, it's not free.
This past weekend I even went to a MLS game! I had 4 light beers while there. Yes, four! @_@ I think the only reason that didn't come bite me in the ass was I tracked my beers, than made sure to drink lots of water to flush my system.
I am feeling pretty dang good right about now. I can't wait for next Weds to see where I'll be then! So the moral of the story is...just keep on keeping on. If it's not working, thing about why, instead of being depressed.
So last week was my first official weigh in, let's talk about that. I lost .4 of a lb. I was so depressed and disapointed in myself and the program that I wanted to go right to McDonalds and eat a quarter pounder and a large fry! Thankfully my Mom talked me out of it and we went home and made a delicious meal together (Hungry Girl Chow Mein) which is amazing BTW.
So how do you overcome a disappointing weigh in? Well not by eating crap! That's for sure! I knew something I was doing was wrong. Last time I was on WW I lost 5lbs in the first week! What had changed this time? Well the plan and the points system have changed...OH fruit is 0 points now! I had been eating anywhere from 5-8 servings of fruit a day. That was totally my problem. Just because fruit is free doesn't mean you should eat so many servings of it! Fruit has a lot of natural sugar, and some fruits are very carby.
OK so after getting my fruit intake to 3-4 servings a day and upping my veggie intake (Stir fry is a great way to sneak in veggies! Also homemade egg white breakfast burritos loaded with peppers, mushrooms, spinach, and onions is also a good way to sneak in veggies). I finally had a weight loss this week! I lost 2lbs! YAY! I now weigh 171! Next week I might even be down into the 160's. That would be really amazing :)
So how did I lose weight this week? Well cut back on fruit, upped veggies, I always, ALWAYS, try to drink 12 8oz glasses of water a day, and most importantly I try to track every.single.thing.I.eat! I cannot even express how important that is. Took a bit of cheesecake? Track it! Even if it's just one point, it's not free.
This past weekend I even went to a MLS game! I had 4 light beers while there. Yes, four! @_@ I think the only reason that didn't come bite me in the ass was I tracked my beers, than made sure to drink lots of water to flush my system.
I am feeling pretty dang good right about now. I can't wait for next Weds to see where I'll be then! So the moral of the story is...just keep on keeping on. If it's not working, thing about why, instead of being depressed.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Who's your biggest critic?
Who is your biggest naysayer? Is it you? Is it your family? A best friend?
How do you overcome it when someone you care about is telling you you can't do something?
I don't know anybody, anybody who doesn't have at least one person in their life who is supporting what they're doing, or trying to do to better themselves. Sometimes its someone really close, like your Grandmother or Mother, and sometimes it's someone who isn't so close and has no right to naysay!
So how can we overcome negative thoughts and comments? Do you ever say negative things to people you care about and why?
I struggle everyday not only with myself thinking and saying negative things, but other people saying them to and about me. I'm getting better at going "OK wow, this person obviously isn't happy with themselves if they have to be so down on me!" But I also have to turn the tables and think before I say something "Is this something I would want someone to say to me?" Sometimes it's not!
So what can you do when someone says something that hurts your feelings? Ultimately I'd love to be able to say in a calm way "That was really rude, and quite frankly it hurt my feelings." At the point I'm at right now, I think it's more of just a disgusted look on my face rather than being able to express my feelings. I mean, what's the worst that could happen if I voice those feelings? So someone gets angry at me because they said something nasty!? HA!
TOMORROW IS MY FIRST WEIGH IN! YAY! I've been drinking so much water and tracking every single thing I eat, down to the last drop/crumb/slice! I even got out and walked a few times in the nice weather! Today my Mom and I washed our cars very vigorously and even earned some activity points for it! Plus it feels nice to have a clean car too (stupid trees).
I need to take a screen shot of my Weight Watchers log of everything I've eaten and how many points it is, and post it instead of typing it all out as my food log here on the blog. It's so much easier when I'm tracking on WW than typing it out here.
Well! Off to watch the last ep of Biggest Loser before the finale! Update tomorrow night after my weigh in!
How do you overcome it when someone you care about is telling you you can't do something?
I don't know anybody, anybody who doesn't have at least one person in their life who is supporting what they're doing, or trying to do to better themselves. Sometimes its someone really close, like your Grandmother or Mother, and sometimes it's someone who isn't so close and has no right to naysay!
So how can we overcome negative thoughts and comments? Do you ever say negative things to people you care about and why?
I struggle everyday not only with myself thinking and saying negative things, but other people saying them to and about me. I'm getting better at going "OK wow, this person obviously isn't happy with themselves if they have to be so down on me!" But I also have to turn the tables and think before I say something "Is this something I would want someone to say to me?" Sometimes it's not!
So what can you do when someone says something that hurts your feelings? Ultimately I'd love to be able to say in a calm way "That was really rude, and quite frankly it hurt my feelings." At the point I'm at right now, I think it's more of just a disgusted look on my face rather than being able to express my feelings. I mean, what's the worst that could happen if I voice those feelings? So someone gets angry at me because they said something nasty!? HA!
TOMORROW IS MY FIRST WEIGH IN! YAY! I've been drinking so much water and tracking every single thing I eat, down to the last drop/crumb/slice! I even got out and walked a few times in the nice weather! Today my Mom and I washed our cars very vigorously and even earned some activity points for it! Plus it feels nice to have a clean car too (stupid trees).
I need to take a screen shot of my Weight Watchers log of everything I've eaten and how many points it is, and post it instead of typing it all out as my food log here on the blog. It's so much easier when I'm tracking on WW than typing it out here.
Well! Off to watch the last ep of Biggest Loser before the finale! Update tomorrow night after my weigh in!
Monday, May 9, 2011
Tea, water, water, water, tea, tea, tea!
I've been drinking a lot of tea before bed! It really seems to help with sweet cravings and help me relax before bed. Plus it counts as part of your daily water total! Although I try to drink 12 8oz glasses of water, then count whatever else I drank.
Drinking water flushes out your system and all the salt and other bad things you may have eaten. It also helps It also keeps you regular if you know what I mean...
So I've been doing pretty well this week! My Mom went ahead and weighed herself. Our scale is off by about 3-4lbs but so far it says she lost 4lbs! That's pretty good! I haven't weighed myself, and don't plan to until Wednesday at our Weight Watchers meeting. Mostly because if I see that I haven't lost any weight, or have only lost a tiny bit I'll be discouraged and then want to binge eat.
Let's talk about binge eating. So far this week I haven't done it at all! That's a huge accomplishment for me! Usually I'll do it anywhere between 2-4 times a week. After I binge eat I feel disgusting, guilty, fat, depressed, hopeless. So why do I do it? Why do I want to eat to the point that I feel so full and gross! And eat foods that are doing nothing for your body too. I don't really know. I'd like to know. I try to think about it and how I feel when I do it, how I feel afterwards. Neither are good. I think it's just a way to emotionally soothe yourself (at least for me) when I don't know how to handle how I'm feeling, or can't express those feelings either to myself or to who I'm having issues with.
So how do you stop binge eating? Well that's another hard one, because if I had it figured out I wouldn't be doing it anymore, right? Also I think once you've been a binge eater it's really hard to break the habit, no matter how good you've been doing. It's constant fear that you could do it again at any time. I did it when I was thin, I do it when I'm fat. Just now that I'm older and overweight it contributes to the problem and only exacerbates it.
Yikes, this is getting pretty heavy! So let's talk about the things I do to stop it! First, eat a piece or fruit or some veggies and drink and entire 8oz glass of water. Wait at least 25 mins. Assess the situation. Am I still hungry? How bad is it? 1 being hardly hungry at all, and a 10 being so starving you can't even stand. OK it's about a 6. Your stomach takes about 20-25 minutes to register that you've eaten something if you're obese so it's best to wait at least this long before eating something else. So now it's been 25 mins and you're still hungry. Let's first drink another 8oz glass of water. If you're still hungry after that maybe it's time to think about eating some protein. Do you have low fat sandwich meat? Can you bake a chicken breast? These are better options than eating a entire can of Pringles or sitting down with a entire box of cookies. This is the strategy I've been using lately to determine if I'm hungry and if I need to eat anything, and if so what.
Also think about what you're putting into your body. Veggies and fruit provide vitamins and fiber your body can adsorb easier than if you're taking a supplement to try and make up for not getting enough vitamins and minerals. If I think "hey does this do anything for me?" I'm less likely to eat some Oreo's!
Well that's about all for tonight! I'm feeling pretty good right about now! I still have some points left for today so I think I'll eat a few Wheat Thins, and some baby carrots!
Drinking water flushes out your system and all the salt and other bad things you may have eaten. It also helps It also keeps you regular if you know what I mean...
So I've been doing pretty well this week! My Mom went ahead and weighed herself. Our scale is off by about 3-4lbs but so far it says she lost 4lbs! That's pretty good! I haven't weighed myself, and don't plan to until Wednesday at our Weight Watchers meeting. Mostly because if I see that I haven't lost any weight, or have only lost a tiny bit I'll be discouraged and then want to binge eat.
Let's talk about binge eating. So far this week I haven't done it at all! That's a huge accomplishment for me! Usually I'll do it anywhere between 2-4 times a week. After I binge eat I feel disgusting, guilty, fat, depressed, hopeless. So why do I do it? Why do I want to eat to the point that I feel so full and gross! And eat foods that are doing nothing for your body too. I don't really know. I'd like to know. I try to think about it and how I feel when I do it, how I feel afterwards. Neither are good. I think it's just a way to emotionally soothe yourself (at least for me) when I don't know how to handle how I'm feeling, or can't express those feelings either to myself or to who I'm having issues with.
So how do you stop binge eating? Well that's another hard one, because if I had it figured out I wouldn't be doing it anymore, right? Also I think once you've been a binge eater it's really hard to break the habit, no matter how good you've been doing. It's constant fear that you could do it again at any time. I did it when I was thin, I do it when I'm fat. Just now that I'm older and overweight it contributes to the problem and only exacerbates it.
Yikes, this is getting pretty heavy! So let's talk about the things I do to stop it! First, eat a piece or fruit or some veggies and drink and entire 8oz glass of water. Wait at least 25 mins. Assess the situation. Am I still hungry? How bad is it? 1 being hardly hungry at all, and a 10 being so starving you can't even stand. OK it's about a 6. Your stomach takes about 20-25 minutes to register that you've eaten something if you're obese so it's best to wait at least this long before eating something else. So now it's been 25 mins and you're still hungry. Let's first drink another 8oz glass of water. If you're still hungry after that maybe it's time to think about eating some protein. Do you have low fat sandwich meat? Can you bake a chicken breast? These are better options than eating a entire can of Pringles or sitting down with a entire box of cookies. This is the strategy I've been using lately to determine if I'm hungry and if I need to eat anything, and if so what.
Also think about what you're putting into your body. Veggies and fruit provide vitamins and fiber your body can adsorb easier than if you're taking a supplement to try and make up for not getting enough vitamins and minerals. If I think "hey does this do anything for me?" I'm less likely to eat some Oreo's!
Well that's about all for tonight! I'm feeling pretty good right about now! I still have some points left for today so I think I'll eat a few Wheat Thins, and some baby carrots!
Friday, May 6, 2011
Feeling pretty good, and full. So so so full...
Second day of Weight Watchers! I have 29 points to use everyday. It's best to get to 29 points or as close as you can within a few points. Most people think the less points they eat the more weight you'll lose. WRONG! The program is designed so that you're getting optimum calories for your height/weight. Eating too little points and you wont be getting enough calories, your body will go into starvation mode and you'll lose nothing. Eat over your points (and we're not talking allowance points) constantly and you won't be losing weight because you're eating too many calories. It's all about balance!
Let's start with what I ate today:
For brunch (since I woke up at 12) 3 egg whites, red, yellow, and green sweet peppers, onions on a wheat tortilla with just a few grates of sharp cheddar cheese (like we're talking less than 1/8th of a cup)
1 orange
1 Del Monte peaches in light peach juice
1 serving fresh Blueberries
1 serving fresh Raspberries
For dinner - Hungry Girl Chow Mein recipe with fresh broccoli, bean sprouts, carrots, and mushrooms, with tofu noodles
Nature's Path Dark Chocolate Coconut granola bar
Jello Temptation Strawberry Cheesecake (150 cals! so good!)
I still have 11 points remaining for today. Since I kinda skipped over breakfast/had brunch instead I'll probably eat a sandwich before I end up falling asleep :) I might even put a thin slice of cheddar on it! Woot! I've been using wheat/whole grain sandwich thins to make sandwiches with. People often don't realize that one piece of bread is a serving. That's it. Done! But no one want to just eat half a freakin' sandwich! Using the sandwich thin totally helps you feel like you're eating two pieces of bread, but really it's only one serving.
Let's see...what else happened today? Went to Costco to stock up on more fruit and veggies since we've been going through them so fast! (Which is great!) Also picked up a case of Chobani fat free Greek yogurt. Seriously it's the best Greek yogurt I've tried, and I've eaten almost all the brands out there on the market. Chobani manages to be sweet, and a little tangy without being overwhelming. Plus it's all natural and doesn't use artificial sweeteners, which my friend swears will be the death of us.
I've also been making sure to drink tons of water. I ended up not walking outside today since it was cold, and then started raining shortly after I woke up. My Mom got off work early today so we decided to run errands together, then make dinner together. Usually it's just her making dinner and me sitting on the couch typing, or me observing her making dinner and asking lots of questions about prep. (I hate cooking meats. I'm always afraid I'll under cook it). Or it's sometimes me in the kitchen making something and my mom telling me how while she plays on the computer! So tonight it was nice that we both did it together!
I'm getting ready to head to bed here. I still have one more glass of water I need to drink, and then get rid of before I'll be able to lay down and actually sleep without having to run to the bathroom every 20 minutes XD
I hope tomorrow I feel extra motivated to walk on the treadmill! I know I need to be more active, but I'll always take another hour of sleep over working out. Always. It's a HUGE struggle to roll out of bed and throw on those exercise clothes, rather than just laze in bed for another hour. I should try setting out my exercise clothes the night before so when I wake up it's the first thing I see. Maybe that will help! Hopefully I won't just roll over and hit the snooze button :)
Anyway, feeling pretty good! Still a little bloated from eating so much fiber. Takes the body awhile to get used to it.
Let's start with what I ate today:
For brunch (since I woke up at 12) 3 egg whites, red, yellow, and green sweet peppers, onions on a wheat tortilla with just a few grates of sharp cheddar cheese (like we're talking less than 1/8th of a cup)
1 orange
1 Del Monte peaches in light peach juice
1 serving fresh Blueberries
1 serving fresh Raspberries
For dinner - Hungry Girl Chow Mein recipe with fresh broccoli, bean sprouts, carrots, and mushrooms, with tofu noodles
Nature's Path Dark Chocolate Coconut granola bar
Jello Temptation Strawberry Cheesecake (150 cals! so good!)
I still have 11 points remaining for today. Since I kinda skipped over breakfast/had brunch instead I'll probably eat a sandwich before I end up falling asleep :) I might even put a thin slice of cheddar on it! Woot! I've been using wheat/whole grain sandwich thins to make sandwiches with. People often don't realize that one piece of bread is a serving. That's it. Done! But no one want to just eat half a freakin' sandwich! Using the sandwich thin totally helps you feel like you're eating two pieces of bread, but really it's only one serving.
Let's see...what else happened today? Went to Costco to stock up on more fruit and veggies since we've been going through them so fast! (Which is great!) Also picked up a case of Chobani fat free Greek yogurt. Seriously it's the best Greek yogurt I've tried, and I've eaten almost all the brands out there on the market. Chobani manages to be sweet, and a little tangy without being overwhelming. Plus it's all natural and doesn't use artificial sweeteners, which my friend swears will be the death of us.
I've also been making sure to drink tons of water. I ended up not walking outside today since it was cold, and then started raining shortly after I woke up. My Mom got off work early today so we decided to run errands together, then make dinner together. Usually it's just her making dinner and me sitting on the couch typing, or me observing her making dinner and asking lots of questions about prep. (I hate cooking meats. I'm always afraid I'll under cook it). Or it's sometimes me in the kitchen making something and my mom telling me how while she plays on the computer! So tonight it was nice that we both did it together!
I'm getting ready to head to bed here. I still have one more glass of water I need to drink, and then get rid of before I'll be able to lay down and actually sleep without having to run to the bathroom every 20 minutes XD
I hope tomorrow I feel extra motivated to walk on the treadmill! I know I need to be more active, but I'll always take another hour of sleep over working out. Always. It's a HUGE struggle to roll out of bed and throw on those exercise clothes, rather than just laze in bed for another hour. I should try setting out my exercise clothes the night before so when I wake up it's the first thing I see. Maybe that will help! Hopefully I won't just roll over and hit the snooze button :)
Anyway, feeling pretty good! Still a little bloated from eating so much fiber. Takes the body awhile to get used to it.
Thursday, May 5, 2011
12 glasses of water a day keep the Dr away! (at least you'd hope)
So today was my first day counting my points for the day! I have 29 points (way more than the 21 I used to get), and now that fruit and veggies* are 0 so that frees up a lot of your points for other things you'd like to eat.
So let's start off with my food diary for the day:
Breakfast - Banana (had a headache, wasn't hungry)
Fiberful fruit leather
For lunch - 1/2 cup mashed potatoes w/low sodium chicken gravy with mushrooms and onions
A Del Monte Pear fruit cup (in pear juice not syrup)
5 giant Strawberries
1 cup romaine lettuce with 1/4 cup shredded carrots (2 tbsp fat free Catalina dressing)
15 Cat Cookies for people (Trader Joe's healthy animal crackers basically)
For dinner - Leftover turkey chili with 1/2 cup white rice
I still have 8 points left for today @_@ I don't know what I could eat that would take up 8 points!
I've also been drinking about 12 cups of water everyday for about 4 days now. Talk about having to pee every 5 mins...
I didn't walk this morning, 1) because I had a headache and 2) I was sore and being lazy. I feel a day of rest doesn't really hurt :)
So far so good. I might reward myself with a Jell-o temptation later, but I've been trying to cut back on my dairy to see if it helps with migraines. It sooo helps not to eat so much dairy...
I'm feeling pretty good right now, a little bloated but I'm drinking some tea right now to help. Prob all that fiber! Takes awhile for you body to get used to eating so much of it!
* Not all veggies are zero. The starchy ones are still points!
So let's start off with my food diary for the day:
Breakfast - Banana (had a headache, wasn't hungry)
Fiberful fruit leather
For lunch - 1/2 cup mashed potatoes w/low sodium chicken gravy with mushrooms and onions
A Del Monte Pear fruit cup (in pear juice not syrup)
5 giant Strawberries
1 cup romaine lettuce with 1/4 cup shredded carrots (2 tbsp fat free Catalina dressing)
15 Cat Cookies for people (Trader Joe's healthy animal crackers basically)
For dinner - Leftover turkey chili with 1/2 cup white rice
I still have 8 points left for today @_@ I don't know what I could eat that would take up 8 points!
I've also been drinking about 12 cups of water everyday for about 4 days now. Talk about having to pee every 5 mins...
I didn't walk this morning, 1) because I had a headache and 2) I was sore and being lazy. I feel a day of rest doesn't really hurt :)
So far so good. I might reward myself with a Jell-o temptation later, but I've been trying to cut back on my dairy to see if it helps with migraines. It sooo helps not to eat so much dairy...
I'm feeling pretty good right now, a little bloated but I'm drinking some tea right now to help. Prob all that fiber! Takes awhile for you body to get used to eating so much of it!
* Not all veggies are zero. The starchy ones are still points!
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Weight Watchers!
Yay! Today was our first Weight Watchers meeting, and our first time back in over a year. It's the new PointsPlus system that encourages you to eat more fruits and veggies! I'm totally excited to be doing this again, and to be able to eat all the fruits and (most) veggies!
So my official weight was 173.6 lbs. Yikes. Still better than when I started my weight loss journey a few years ago (just over a year ago? has it been that long?) when I was at 190lbs. My BMI is still significantly lower than it was then, so at least that's something positive!
So let's start off with my eating journal for today:
24 Frosted Mini wheats for breakfast (1 serving)
w/ 1/2 c lowfat Lactaid milk
5 Giant Strawberries
1 Trader Joes Fiberful fruit leather (60 cals, 0 fat, 6 grams fiber)
1 Organic dark chocolate coconut granola bar
1 Chobani peach fat free Greek yogurt (lunch, since I had heartburn)
1 sheet (1/2 serving) low fat graham cracker
1 cup all natural applesauce
A medium sized Banana
1/2 cup mashed potatos (dinner) w/2oz chicken breast and mushroom and onions in a low fat low sodium gravy made from organic low sodium chicken broth
So I have 29 points for everyday. Today since we just found out how many points we have/how the program works at 6pm I didn't go back and figure out all my totals to see how many points I have left to today. I think I'll just eat fruits and veggies if I get hungry since they're 0 now (not all veggies, the starchy ones are still points).
I'm feeling really good. I've been drinking tons of water, walking in the gorgeous sun (with sunscreen of course), and generally just detoxing from my previous lifestyle.
I've decided to cut way back on the dairy I'm eating, since my lactose intolerance seems to be causing my severe migraines. I did end up eating a yogurt earlier because I had the worst heartburn from the turkey chili we had last night. Other than that today and yesterday were dairy free! I had a slight headache earlier but it went away after I drank a litre of water.
I'm excited to go walking again tomorrow, and I hope the weather holds out so it's nice! This weekend is supposed to be kinda shitty but it's the 20th Annual Walk/Run for the Southwest Washington Humane Society and I'd like to go to that if I can. We'll see how it goes! There's a 5K walk, which I know I'd be able to do if I didn't have plantar fasciitis. Boo feet! I also hope that if we do decide to go we can find someone to come with us who will bring their dog! Yay! Walking with dogs is def more fun than with just humans.
Anyway, my weigh in days are Weds unless something else comes up and I have to weigh in another day.
That's about it for my day! I'm dying to eat a Jello pudding cup but I'll wait. No headaches for me please!
So my official weight was 173.6 lbs. Yikes. Still better than when I started my weight loss journey a few years ago (just over a year ago? has it been that long?) when I was at 190lbs. My BMI is still significantly lower than it was then, so at least that's something positive!
So let's start off with my eating journal for today:
24 Frosted Mini wheats for breakfast (1 serving)
w/ 1/2 c lowfat Lactaid milk
5 Giant Strawberries
1 Trader Joes Fiberful fruit leather (60 cals, 0 fat, 6 grams fiber)
1 Organic dark chocolate coconut granola bar
1 Chobani peach fat free Greek yogurt (lunch, since I had heartburn)
1 sheet (1/2 serving) low fat graham cracker
1 cup all natural applesauce
A medium sized Banana
1/2 cup mashed potatos (dinner) w/2oz chicken breast and mushroom and onions in a low fat low sodium gravy made from organic low sodium chicken broth
So I have 29 points for everyday. Today since we just found out how many points we have/how the program works at 6pm I didn't go back and figure out all my totals to see how many points I have left to today. I think I'll just eat fruits and veggies if I get hungry since they're 0 now (not all veggies, the starchy ones are still points).
I'm feeling really good. I've been drinking tons of water, walking in the gorgeous sun (with sunscreen of course), and generally just detoxing from my previous lifestyle.
I've decided to cut way back on the dairy I'm eating, since my lactose intolerance seems to be causing my severe migraines. I did end up eating a yogurt earlier because I had the worst heartburn from the turkey chili we had last night. Other than that today and yesterday were dairy free! I had a slight headache earlier but it went away after I drank a litre of water.
I'm excited to go walking again tomorrow, and I hope the weather holds out so it's nice! This weekend is supposed to be kinda shitty but it's the 20th Annual Walk/Run for the Southwest Washington Humane Society and I'd like to go to that if I can. We'll see how it goes! There's a 5K walk, which I know I'd be able to do if I didn't have plantar fasciitis. Boo feet! I also hope that if we do decide to go we can find someone to come with us who will bring their dog! Yay! Walking with dogs is def more fun than with just humans.
Anyway, my weigh in days are Weds unless something else comes up and I have to weigh in another day.
That's about it for my day! I'm dying to eat a Jello pudding cup but I'll wait. No headaches for me please!
Monday, May 2, 2011
Buying clothes when you're aero dynamically curvaceous (AKA fat)
For those of you who don't know me personally don't know that I love to shop. For things. Bags, shoes, jewelry (Juicy Couture anyone?). Clothes? Hate it. Absolutely hate it!
Have you ever gone shopping with your hot, thin friend? You know how everything fits them perfect and looks expensive no matter how cheap it is? Yeah that doesn't happen for me, ever, at all. I have to try on at least 20 pieces of clothes before I find just one thing that works. It's beyond annoying and aggravating.
Well it's that time again. My clothes are looking worn and bleh. No matter how careful I am with washing my clothes in warm water and hanging them to dry, you can only wear something for so long before the fabric starts to fade and the cotton begins to pill.
I desperately need a bra! MAN I HATE BRA SHOPPING! First of all, I am very well endowed in the chest area. That's fine and all but if you think shopping for clothes is annoying imagine trying to find a cute bra for DDDD breasts.
Not only do I need bras, I need shirts. I have like no shirts! Everything is so cute when it's so small! Bras, shoes (thankfully I have tiny feet), and shirts. Everything looks cute in sz extra small!
The other disheartening thing is whenever we go past some place like Torrid or Catherine's Big and Tall shop my mom goes "Oh let's go in there and get you some clothes!" The thing she doesn't understand is those places are actually TOO BIG for me! They usually start off as a sz 18 and sell it as a "sz 12," or "sz 1," to make you feel better about yourself. It doesn't though, and like I said it's all TOO HUGE! I'm a sz 12 - 16 depending on the brand/style/fit. Not a sz 18! I can't tell if she's being helpful or just being mean to me. I've tried telling her about 5-6 times that those places start at size 18 and not anywhere near anything small enough that will fit me, but she seems to think I'm lying...
Anyway. Today I had a Chobani fat free Greek yogurt for breakfast. A few hours later I had a organic dark chocolate and coconut granola bar with a Trader Joe's Fiberful flat fruit. For lunch I had a flat bread sandwich with low fat turkey lunch meat, a tiny bit of reduced fat mayo, and some spicy brown mustard. Yum! For dinner just now we had low fat tortilla burritos with ground turkey instead of beef! Instead of sour cream I used a dollop of Greek Fat Free Yogurt instead. And so far that's my day! Plus lots of water! Lots and lots and lots of water. You almost couldn't drink enough water. I mean you can, but my Dr said it seriously needs to be like 4 gallons or more of water before you "over hydrate."
So far I feel like today was pretty successful! My Mom brought home a cupcake from the batch she baked and took to work today. I told her I'd split it in half with her since I don't want to eat the whole thing :)
Have you ever gone shopping with your hot, thin friend? You know how everything fits them perfect and looks expensive no matter how cheap it is? Yeah that doesn't happen for me, ever, at all. I have to try on at least 20 pieces of clothes before I find just one thing that works. It's beyond annoying and aggravating.
Well it's that time again. My clothes are looking worn and bleh. No matter how careful I am with washing my clothes in warm water and hanging them to dry, you can only wear something for so long before the fabric starts to fade and the cotton begins to pill.
I desperately need a bra! MAN I HATE BRA SHOPPING! First of all, I am very well endowed in the chest area. That's fine and all but if you think shopping for clothes is annoying imagine trying to find a cute bra for DDDD breasts.
Not only do I need bras, I need shirts. I have like no shirts! Everything is so cute when it's so small! Bras, shoes (thankfully I have tiny feet), and shirts. Everything looks cute in sz extra small!
The other disheartening thing is whenever we go past some place like Torrid or Catherine's Big and Tall shop my mom goes "Oh let's go in there and get you some clothes!" The thing she doesn't understand is those places are actually TOO BIG for me! They usually start off as a sz 18 and sell it as a "sz 12," or "sz 1," to make you feel better about yourself. It doesn't though, and like I said it's all TOO HUGE! I'm a sz 12 - 16 depending on the brand/style/fit. Not a sz 18! I can't tell if she's being helpful or just being mean to me. I've tried telling her about 5-6 times that those places start at size 18 and not anywhere near anything small enough that will fit me, but she seems to think I'm lying...
Anyway. Today I had a Chobani fat free Greek yogurt for breakfast. A few hours later I had a organic dark chocolate and coconut granola bar with a Trader Joe's Fiberful flat fruit. For lunch I had a flat bread sandwich with low fat turkey lunch meat, a tiny bit of reduced fat mayo, and some spicy brown mustard. Yum! For dinner just now we had low fat tortilla burritos with ground turkey instead of beef! Instead of sour cream I used a dollop of Greek Fat Free Yogurt instead. And so far that's my day! Plus lots of water! Lots and lots and lots of water. You almost couldn't drink enough water. I mean you can, but my Dr said it seriously needs to be like 4 gallons or more of water before you "over hydrate."
So far I feel like today was pretty successful! My Mom brought home a cupcake from the batch she baked and took to work today. I told her I'd split it in half with her since I don't want to eat the whole thing :)
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Macaron pics!
Just a quick update to show pics of my Macaron efforts from earlier in the day!
My cat MoMo approves! Don't worry he's only sniffing.
Turns out I under mixed the batter a little and that's why there's a peak at the top. You live you learn!
My cat MoMo approves! Don't worry he's only sniffing.
Turns out I under mixed the batter a little and that's why there's a peak at the top. You live you learn!
Macaron temptation!
Well today was a pretty good day. My migraine finally went away. I didn't start out my day with a walk like I normally would, and instead helped my Mom with the making of birthday cards for her co-workers. April is Bday month for like half the Earth's population! (At least it feels like it!)
For breakfast I had Organic Blueberry Flaxseed oatmeal, and then an hour later a 60 calorie all natural Trader Joe's Fiber Fruit bar. Not bad!
We decided today we would try to make a French Pastry I've always wanted to try...the Macron! Oh the elusive Macron! Apparently it's supposed to be really hard to do, and American's are incapable of making a good one. I was really interested to try it. It's basically a meringue cookie with a filling of some sort (usually jam, ganache, or buttercream). A few days ago I did some pretty through research and found an awesome blog I wanted to use from this awesome lady. So the first thing we did was go grocery shopping since you need Almond Flour, which I've never used, and which is usually hard to find unless you go to a specialty store. Lucky for me we have a food processor and it's easy to make your own!
So off to Winco we went to do some healthy grocery shopping and get some almonds for the flour. Well after shopping we (my Mom and I. Usually who I'm referring to anytime I say "we.") decided we were famished and went to the Subway right across from the grocery store. I had a 6" Whole Grain Wheat bread Turkey Breast sub with lots of veggies, and just a tiny bit of light mayo one it. About 300 calories and 7 grams of fat. Still doing well! I also had a 0 calorie Snapple tea with my lunch too. Still doing good!
So on to the baking. I won't go into detail, but we were marginally successful with our Macaron project. Our batter was slightly under mixed, but the first batch into the oven came out SO CUTE and light and fluffy with their little "feet." Almost perfect! The second batch we used a Jellyroll pan instead of a cookie sheet or insulated air pan (like our first sheet) and they came out crackled and collapsed. Hrm. Obviously can't use any other pan but the insulated air pan. Tried another batch on a regular old cookie sheet (like we've had this thing for at least 7 years) and the ones in the middle of the pan came out PERFECT but the ones all along the edges crackled and collapsed. Yikes. Decided to buy more insulated air pans and throw the old pan out. Might get around to that next weekend!
So next was making the buttercream. Because I'm lactose intolerant I use an awesome Vegan Buttercream recipe from Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World.
The recipe if you're curious is;
1 stick Earth Balance vegan "butter"
1/2 cup Vegan shortening (use Earth Balance brand or get some from Whole Foods)
3 1/2 cups Sifted powdered sugar (confectioners sugar)
2 teaspoons Vanilla extract (use clear for white frosting and reg if you don't give a shit)
and 1/4 cup soy milk (or almond, you get the point)
Now with a stand mixer (so much easier than using a handheld!) Beat the Earth Balance and the shortening for about 3-5 minutes until combined and fluffy on medium high. Then add your sifted powered sugar slow, make sure the mixer is on low while you're doing this unless you want to be covered in powered sugar! After all the powdered sugar is in then turn the speed back up to medium high, and beat for about 3-5 minutes until fully incorporated. Now turn off the mixer and add your vanilla and soy milk (also this is a great time to add gel food coloring if you're doing so). Beat on low until not sloshy, then turn the speed up to med/high and beat for 5-7 minutes or until the buttercream is fluffy. Now you're done! Pipe it or frost it onto cupcakes or delicious Macrons, or well, anything you want buttercream on really.
So after I made the buttercream and while the Macrons were cooling my Mom and I decided we really needed to test the failed Macrons to see how they tasted. Still pretty tasty, even if they were collapsed and crackly. So I filled the good ones and packed them into an air-tight container for my Mom to take to her co-workers. Now, here's the part where we were bad today. I've probably eaten like 10 Macrons! That includes the ones that actually got made into sandwiches. So yeah, didn't do to well there today. It's hard to bake and then not eat what you baked. OK so maybe not so hard, maybe just need more self control as to not over taste test what you bake! I think that's totally do able. I just need more self control. I wonder where I can get some...
As for dinner, we're going to have Turkey hot dogs, which are about 5 grams of fat per dog, and 70 calories per dog. I tried to persuade my Mom that we should buy wheat hot dog buns, but I have to agree with her, they're not very tasty. We've tried many a brand but they're just not very tasty, and we're both people who really like wheat bread!
Anyway that was my day today! If I can figure out how I'll post a pic of my cute little Macarons!
For breakfast I had Organic Blueberry Flaxseed oatmeal, and then an hour later a 60 calorie all natural Trader Joe's Fiber Fruit bar. Not bad!
We decided today we would try to make a French Pastry I've always wanted to try...the Macron! Oh the elusive Macron! Apparently it's supposed to be really hard to do, and American's are incapable of making a good one. I was really interested to try it. It's basically a meringue cookie with a filling of some sort (usually jam, ganache, or buttercream). A few days ago I did some pretty through research and found an awesome blog I wanted to use from this awesome lady. So the first thing we did was go grocery shopping since you need Almond Flour, which I've never used, and which is usually hard to find unless you go to a specialty store. Lucky for me we have a food processor and it's easy to make your own!
So off to Winco we went to do some healthy grocery shopping and get some almonds for the flour. Well after shopping we (my Mom and I. Usually who I'm referring to anytime I say "we.") decided we were famished and went to the Subway right across from the grocery store. I had a 6" Whole Grain Wheat bread Turkey Breast sub with lots of veggies, and just a tiny bit of light mayo one it. About 300 calories and 7 grams of fat. Still doing well! I also had a 0 calorie Snapple tea with my lunch too. Still doing good!
So on to the baking. I won't go into detail, but we were marginally successful with our Macaron project. Our batter was slightly under mixed, but the first batch into the oven came out SO CUTE and light and fluffy with their little "feet." Almost perfect! The second batch we used a Jellyroll pan instead of a cookie sheet or insulated air pan (like our first sheet) and they came out crackled and collapsed. Hrm. Obviously can't use any other pan but the insulated air pan. Tried another batch on a regular old cookie sheet (like we've had this thing for at least 7 years) and the ones in the middle of the pan came out PERFECT but the ones all along the edges crackled and collapsed. Yikes. Decided to buy more insulated air pans and throw the old pan out. Might get around to that next weekend!
So next was making the buttercream. Because I'm lactose intolerant I use an awesome Vegan Buttercream recipe from Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World.
The recipe if you're curious is;
1 stick Earth Balance vegan "butter"
1/2 cup Vegan shortening (use Earth Balance brand or get some from Whole Foods)
3 1/2 cups Sifted powdered sugar (confectioners sugar)
2 teaspoons Vanilla extract (use clear for white frosting and reg if you don't give a shit)
and 1/4 cup soy milk (or almond, you get the point)
Now with a stand mixer (so much easier than using a handheld!) Beat the Earth Balance and the shortening for about 3-5 minutes until combined and fluffy on medium high. Then add your sifted powered sugar slow, make sure the mixer is on low while you're doing this unless you want to be covered in powered sugar! After all the powdered sugar is in then turn the speed back up to medium high, and beat for about 3-5 minutes until fully incorporated. Now turn off the mixer and add your vanilla and soy milk (also this is a great time to add gel food coloring if you're doing so). Beat on low until not sloshy, then turn the speed up to med/high and beat for 5-7 minutes or until the buttercream is fluffy. Now you're done! Pipe it or frost it onto cupcakes or delicious Macrons, or well, anything you want buttercream on really.
So after I made the buttercream and while the Macrons were cooling my Mom and I decided we really needed to test the failed Macrons to see how they tasted. Still pretty tasty, even if they were collapsed and crackly. So I filled the good ones and packed them into an air-tight container for my Mom to take to her co-workers. Now, here's the part where we were bad today. I've probably eaten like 10 Macrons! That includes the ones that actually got made into sandwiches. So yeah, didn't do to well there today. It's hard to bake and then not eat what you baked. OK so maybe not so hard, maybe just need more self control as to not over taste test what you bake! I think that's totally do able. I just need more self control. I wonder where I can get some...
As for dinner, we're going to have Turkey hot dogs, which are about 5 grams of fat per dog, and 70 calories per dog. I tried to persuade my Mom that we should buy wheat hot dog buns, but I have to agree with her, they're not very tasty. We've tried many a brand but they're just not very tasty, and we're both people who really like wheat bread!
Anyway that was my day today! If I can figure out how I'll post a pic of my cute little Macarons!
Well hello!
My name is Kari, and I love to bake! I also love to eat. I really love to eat. I especially love to eat what I bake! So the question is, can a fat girl really bake and still lose weight? I sure hope so, because that's exactly what I intend to do. Without compromising my recipes and making them fat free, because let's face it, who had eaten a fat free brownie and really enjoyed it? I know I haven't. The second I try to bake something healthy my friends immediately question it and refuse to eat it, and I can't say I blame them.
I'm 25 right now, about to turn 26 this summer and I'm freaking out. Not only am I getting closer to 30 at what seems to be an alarming rate, but I'm single, and fat, and almost 30. So I'm fat who cares! Well...I used to think I didn't care. About a year and a half ago I lost 15 pounds on my own. I was so surprised that I could do it I joined Weight Watchers and proceeded to lose another 20 pounds. WOW, right? OK well almost. I didn't keep it off. In fact I became so complacent that I gained it all (save 10 pounds) back. Now I'm almost right back to where I started. I hate looking in the mirror, I hate being naked, and I HATE the way I look. It's time to change, and to keep it off.
My weight problems started in High School, or Junior High actually after I was sexually molested by two male classmates. I became depressed. I didn't want to go to school, I would skin, sit home on the couch and gorge myself until bursting while watching the view. My family is Japanese, and being the way they are they constantly would put down the way I looked. I dreaded family affairs. Oh god seeing my family was the worst! "Have you gained weight? You're looking pretty fat!" They'd chime in helpfully. This didn't help at all. It would only make me binge eat more. I joined Jenny Craig when I was in 8th grade, but didn't lose any weight and the food was disgusting. Again at 18 when my weight ballooned again after being a size 7 for many year (which my family and myself still considered super fat) I joined LA Weightloss. I had some success here but still wasn't motivated to lose big time.
So what went wrong? Why do I keep binging? Why can't I keep the weight off? I have no idea! I mean I have some idea. I eat when I'm sad, happy, bored, celebrating, depressed. My life revolves around food. I think about it every second of everyday. It's like a constant niggling in the back of my mind. I just had a bowl of Frosted Mini Wheats about 30 mins ago. Was I hungry? Not really. Why did I eat then? What possessed me to go and eat a bowl of cereal at 12AM. It's not anywhere near breakfast time!
It's time to be really honest with myself and look at everything, maybe talk to a professional. I had a meeting with a nutritionist last year. She said I was aware of healthy eating choices, had good idea of what portions should be, so what am I doing wrong? Obviously everything.
Well I've reached that breaking point again. My beautiful cousin is getting married on a cruise to Alaska in August. Yes I'm going. And yes, I'm probably going to see some of my family who will without a doubt be judging my weight. Before I go to Alaska I want to lose at least 20 pounds. I am joining Weight Watchers again this week. After working out again this past week after not exercising for at least 6-8 months and it was PURE TORTURE. I was sweaty, and dizzy, and out of breath. I forgot not to drink too much water while walking and felt like I had to puke. This will not be an easy journey, and that's OK. As long as I admit that I need help, that yes, I have a serious problem and I'm not afraid to ask for help I think I can get through this.
I started this blog to be brutally honest with myself. With my friends too, because I am not the kind of person who can easily ask for help, and tell others what I'm going through. I feel like such a failure and a burden, and I'm tired of feeling that way.
Here's the truth: I am 4'10.5", right now I weight 170lbs, and my BMI is a shameful 34.92%. My goal weight is 120lbs, and 24.65% BMI which is still kinda high for someone of my short stature. I'm going to be logging what I ate, how I feel, and the exercise I've done for the day. I'm going to put down every time I binge eat, or feel like I want to binge eat. And I'm going to ask for help and acceptance.
I don't believe in starving yourself. I've tried that too (in 9th grade I weighed under 100lbs and was a sz 2). I believe in everything in moderation. Now let's see how far I can take this. I hope you'll take this journey with me and help me stay honest with myself.
I'm 25 right now, about to turn 26 this summer and I'm freaking out. Not only am I getting closer to 30 at what seems to be an alarming rate, but I'm single, and fat, and almost 30. So I'm fat who cares! Well...I used to think I didn't care. About a year and a half ago I lost 15 pounds on my own. I was so surprised that I could do it I joined Weight Watchers and proceeded to lose another 20 pounds. WOW, right? OK well almost. I didn't keep it off. In fact I became so complacent that I gained it all (save 10 pounds) back. Now I'm almost right back to where I started. I hate looking in the mirror, I hate being naked, and I HATE the way I look. It's time to change, and to keep it off.
My weight problems started in High School, or Junior High actually after I was sexually molested by two male classmates. I became depressed. I didn't want to go to school, I would skin, sit home on the couch and gorge myself until bursting while watching the view. My family is Japanese, and being the way they are they constantly would put down the way I looked. I dreaded family affairs. Oh god seeing my family was the worst! "Have you gained weight? You're looking pretty fat!" They'd chime in helpfully. This didn't help at all. It would only make me binge eat more. I joined Jenny Craig when I was in 8th grade, but didn't lose any weight and the food was disgusting. Again at 18 when my weight ballooned again after being a size 7 for many year (which my family and myself still considered super fat) I joined LA Weightloss. I had some success here but still wasn't motivated to lose big time.
So what went wrong? Why do I keep binging? Why can't I keep the weight off? I have no idea! I mean I have some idea. I eat when I'm sad, happy, bored, celebrating, depressed. My life revolves around food. I think about it every second of everyday. It's like a constant niggling in the back of my mind. I just had a bowl of Frosted Mini Wheats about 30 mins ago. Was I hungry? Not really. Why did I eat then? What possessed me to go and eat a bowl of cereal at 12AM. It's not anywhere near breakfast time!
It's time to be really honest with myself and look at everything, maybe talk to a professional. I had a meeting with a nutritionist last year. She said I was aware of healthy eating choices, had good idea of what portions should be, so what am I doing wrong? Obviously everything.
Well I've reached that breaking point again. My beautiful cousin is getting married on a cruise to Alaska in August. Yes I'm going. And yes, I'm probably going to see some of my family who will without a doubt be judging my weight. Before I go to Alaska I want to lose at least 20 pounds. I am joining Weight Watchers again this week. After working out again this past week after not exercising for at least 6-8 months and it was PURE TORTURE. I was sweaty, and dizzy, and out of breath. I forgot not to drink too much water while walking and felt like I had to puke. This will not be an easy journey, and that's OK. As long as I admit that I need help, that yes, I have a serious problem and I'm not afraid to ask for help I think I can get through this.
I started this blog to be brutally honest with myself. With my friends too, because I am not the kind of person who can easily ask for help, and tell others what I'm going through. I feel like such a failure and a burden, and I'm tired of feeling that way.
Here's the truth: I am 4'10.5", right now I weight 170lbs, and my BMI is a shameful 34.92%. My goal weight is 120lbs, and 24.65% BMI which is still kinda high for someone of my short stature. I'm going to be logging what I ate, how I feel, and the exercise I've done for the day. I'm going to put down every time I binge eat, or feel like I want to binge eat. And I'm going to ask for help and acceptance.
I don't believe in starving yourself. I've tried that too (in 9th grade I weighed under 100lbs and was a sz 2). I believe in everything in moderation. Now let's see how far I can take this. I hope you'll take this journey with me and help me stay honest with myself.
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